a commercial break

for mashed potatoes.

I like my mashed potatoes completely smooth. No lumps. I don’t like lumpy mashed potatoes at all, unless the lumps aren’t potatoes, but are something else…I don’t know, like maybe little bits of fresh garlic. Best are white potatoes, no skins, with a little milk, a little sour cream, a little cheese, a clove of garlic and just a tiny bit of fresh chives. the problem there is that I will eat 4 or 5 potatoes this way, without stopping to inhale. You can also make them with butter instead of sour cream, but I like sour cream in everything.

I don’t like mashed potatoes in restaurants, usually. But I just had KFC mashed potatoes, and they are redeemed purely by the gravy. Gravy is like the whipped cream on your caramel latte, no, like the whipped cream and caramel drizzle on your caramel latte. I generally prefer beef gravy over chicken gravy. I don’t like the flavor of chicken gravy as much, but you know what kind of gravy is a bit of heaven? Ham. Ham gravy. If we abolished turkey dinners for Thanksgiving, and instead instituted a strict menu of ham, mashed potatoes, ham gravy, cream cheesy corn, green beans, fresh rolls and cheesy potatoes, I would gladly lobby Washington. (Do you think that would work?)

But I got off track. I also love T.G.I. Fridays mashed potatoes. (I know, but I was just on this business trip, ate out more in three days than I probably did in all of my college years.) Their mashed potatoes are the closest thing to my homemade ones, and they have the greatest gooey cheese in them. Mashed potatoes are even better than french fries, which is saying a lot, because millions of Americans would tell you, even an OREO is better if fried. I like mashed potatoes better because you can have them salty, you can have them with crispy bits of bacon or tidbits of skin in them. You can eat them plain, with gravy, or with all your peas and corn mixed in. Ooh! That’s another thing I really like, mashed potatoes with roast beef bits mixed in with them and the gravy…and you know what’s close to being a mashed potato? Mushed sweet potatoes, with butter and brown sugar and just a little salt.

I guess what I’m saying is that while I guess you can have cheese fries, chili fries, or dip your fries in (gag me with a naked Barbie) mayonaisse, mashed potatoes still win the personalization contest. I mean, even twice baked potatoes are really just mashed potatoes shoved back into their skin after adding goo and cream cheese (drools…)…

And that’s what I have to say about that.


2 thoughts on “a commercial break

  1. i love mashed potatoes nearly as much as i love coral…coral reefs, like on the bottom of the ocean, that are really beautiful and full of fishes and sharks and octopi, not at all to be confused as to how much i love corals whose heads can be eaten by boxes (it suddenly sounds like there are potentially many of you…weird). anyway, another good thing is that mashed potatoes can be made even in sudan, and i can’t say that there are many other things that are easy to make in sudan. yay.

  2. I completely agree that mashed potatoes beat fries any day of the week and twice on Sundays! I have been making mashed potatoes with Boursin’s garlic and fine herbs Gournay cheese. Yum. Boil red potatoes (skin on), drain, mash with the cheese, butter and salt and a heavenly taste awaits!

    Miss you Coral.

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